Ask WordMum: Lay Vs Lie
This month is all about our second favourite hobby, after writing of course: taking a nap. But do you lay or lie down for one? WordMum knows the secret.
If you want to catch up on existing posts, after your nap, there’s now a dedicated page that lists them all for you, in alphabetical order. If this post, or any others, reminded you of similar tricky words you’d like help with, let WordMum know.
Our Question
What’s the difference between lay and lie?
Terrible Advice
Have a lie down and the correct word will come to you!
WordMum Says
These words are frequently mixed up and confusing when used as verbs relating to putting or resting something on a surface. These words have several different meanings and forms (including nouns), but for the purposes of this post, we are sticking to a single meaning and form (verb).
The key difference is whether the speaker is talking about themself or someone (or something) else. For the word nerds among you, it’s the difference between a transitive (lay) and intransitive (lie) verb.
For example, you lie down, but you lay your partner down. (Your partner is the object here – in a purely grammatical sense; we do not treat people as objects!)
It is the same difference between sit and seat when used as a verb: you sit at the table, but you seat guests at the table. (Guests are the object here.)
One awkward point is that the past tense of lie is lay, which is where a lot of the confusion about these verbs comes from.
Let’s break it down so you can see it more clearly!
Lie (intransitive verb, present tense)
An intransitive verb does not require an object, which means the subject of the sentence is doing the lying. That means you’re doing it to yourself.
I lie down is a complete sentence with:
- I = subject
- lie = present tense verb
- down = second part of a verbal phrase (the verbal phrase is actually lie down here, but I wanted to call out the verb separately)
As you can see, there’s no object in that sentence; the speaker is settling themself down, not something or someone else.
This verb has the following forms:
- Present tense: lie or lies (I lie / he lies)
- Present participle: lying (I am lying here)
- Past tense: lay (I lay on the bed) (this is where it gets confusing with the other verb)
- Past participle: lain (he has lain there for hours)
Note: this is specifically and only the case when using to lie to mean something or someone reclining or being prone on a horizontal surface. The above does not apply when using it to mean someone telling lies, as that verb behaves quite differently. We are not covering that one here today.
Lay (transitive verb, present tense)
A transitive verb requires an object, which means the subject of the sentence is doing something to the object. If it helps, I think of it as transitioning the object.
I lay the sleeping child on the bed and close the curtains is a complete sentence with:
- I = subject
- lay = present tense verb
- the sleeping child = object (what is being laid down)
- close the curtains = second action provided to make it clear that this is present tense! (So it could not be confused with the past tense of lie.)
We have an object here being laid down, and the subject of the sentence is therefore acting upon something else.
This verb has the following forms:
- Present tense: lay or lays (I lay him out / she lays the book down)
- Present participle: laying (I am laying the carpet)
- Past tense: laid (she laid the body on the floor)
- Past participle: laid (The tiles were laid years ago)
How to remember which is which
This is why we’re here today! This is a case of checking which tense you’re writing in and then figuring out which verb you want from there.
I don’t have a trick for this to share with you all, I’m afraid. This is one I have to stop and squint at sometimes! And break down or look up if I’m not sure.
If you have a short cut or tip for how to remember which word to use, I’d love to hear about it!
It can be useful to have a reference or cheat sheet you can refer to. Feel free to bookmark this page or take a copy of useful bits, if that helps!
Unhelpful Exceptions
English wouldn’t be English if there weren’t awkward exceptions that make life hard for us. This situation is no exception! Let’s tackle them quickly to hopefully put the puzzlement where it belongs.
- Get laid = a euphemism for having sex, which also includes having a lay and similar phrasing. It’s too naughty to follow the rules above.
- Lye = noun, not a verb. This is a substance using for washing or cleaning, and is a common component of soap. It’s not an alternative spelling for lie and has no relation to lying.
Example Time!
Now thLet’s take a look at these words in action.
Did the dog lie down or lay down?
The short (and annoying) answer is: it could be either. Both of those options are correct, they’re simply difference tenses:
- The dog lies down = present tense. Note: the form of lie here alters given the subject of the sentence; the dog lie down is incorrect. I am responding to the spirit of the question, not the letter.
- The dog lay down = past tense. Given that the question is about what the dog did, which is in the past tense, this is the more likely correct answer.
The phrase is intransitive (no object; the dog is doing the lying), so you definitely want a form of the verb to lie.
He layed on the floor
This is a common mistake: the word needed here is laid. Layed is an easy misspelling to do, particularly because lay is both present and past tense (of different verbs). Laid sounds the same, it simply doesn’t follow the +ed rule of most verb past tenses.
She lied on the grass
This is grammatically correct, but what it means is that she was telling lies while located on the grass. It does not tell us what position this person is in; she could be standing, sitting, or reclining.
Lied is not the past tense of lie when it is used to describe what position the person or object is in. It is the past tense of lie when referring to telling falsehoods or being deceptive. The two different meanings of the verb to lie conjugate quite differently.
If you mean to talk about this person reclining on the grass, what you want is: she lay on the grass.
“If I lay here”
This one is in quotes, because it’s part of a lyric that often gets called out for using the wrong word, claiming it should be if I lie here. And according to the simple rules I’ve laid out above, that assumption is understandable. However, it’s not that simple.
The full quote from Snow Patrol’s Chasing Cars:
“If I lay here, if I just lay here, would you lie with me and just forget the world”
The second part of the quote (would you lie with me) is more obviously correct but uses the other form. More confusion!
Explanations about why this is grammatically correct vary, but most sources agree that all of it is, in fact, correct usage.
Some explanations claim that it is subjunctive because it’s talking about a possible situation (subjunctives are when you are talking about unreal situations, like wishes, hopes, judgements, opinions, etc). Subjunctives can change how we use verbs, so that could explain why lay is used in this case.
However, a simpler and more likely explanation is the condition (if statement) followed by a conditional clause (result or then statement). Conditions have tenses independent of the conditional clause, and the tense used has implications to the meaning.
The condition in present tense means: if I lie here right now, would you lie with me. The condition is specific to the moment.
In past tense, it means: if I lay here at some point in time, would you lie with me. This is talking about some potential future time, and is less fixed to a single moment. (Paradoxically, a condition in past tense is talking about a future time.)
If it helps, you can replace lie/lay with eat/ate. If I eat, would you eat with me means I am about to get food now, whereas if I ate, would you eat with me means food is not happening right now but I might be angling to ask you out for a date.
According to the simple rules I’ve laid out
I used this phrase above and wanted to call it out because this construction is fairly common and might trip people up. In this clause, there is an object that is being laid (out), but it is before the subject and verb (so the verb for this one is lay).
It can be easy to miss, though, because it’s not the he laid the thing out (subject -> verb -> object) construction. For this sort of phrasing, see if you can swap the words around to make a transitional phrase: in this case: I’ve laid out the simple rules. If you can, you want lay; otherwise, use lie.
And that’s it for our longest Ask WordMum entry to date! I hope that helps untangle some common mistakes and situations! Go forth, lie responsibly.
Watch this space for more wordy shenanigans next month!